Thursday, April 16, 2020

Emotional Investment 5 -on - 1 Blog 4/17/20

Our 5-on-1  topic this week is Emotional Investment. In your time on this third rock from the sun, you will find people and things that you become emotionally invested in.To be emotionally invested is-'can you let me be there for you and trust you to do the same when the tables are turned? ' It is a proactive showing up in times of trouble to support each other, offering to help even if the other wants to manage on their own. Without those things and people life just seems to be lacking. Lacking what? Pretty much everything at one time or another. Emotional investment is in many ways like that secret spice in your favorite recipe - you aren't sure exactly what it is but it makes it taste better. It's that friend that is always there for you or that television show/book/movie that you love. I - for example - have seen the movie Camelot over 25 times and still love it. 

Emotional investment is the special ingredient in a relationship that makes the relationship work. Lose that investment and the relationship flounders and probably dies. The perfect line is in this tune by Gordon Lightfoot - I don't know where we went wrong but the feelings gone and we just can't get it back.


Emotional investment in a friendship is like an all in bet for a gambler. You will do anything for that friend - including and especially disagreeing when you think it is necessary - you always have their back. Emotional investment in your career means you are all in and your work  is much more than a job.

Emotional investment does not guarantee a life without a check engine light. If that person you are emotionally invested in does not feel the same way about you, you need to be able to recognize that fact and move on. To me the anthem of unrequited love was written by Terry Kirkman


Being unable to let go of an emotional investment can be very harmful. History is full  of tales of unrequited love that ended tragically. Everyone has their heart broken at some point - it is simply a chapter in our book of life that adds the experience we need to be a well-rounded and thoughtful individual. Failed relationships are learning experiences.

Emotional investment in one's work makes me think immediately of a couple of guys from my generation that were all in that work, and so they have both made huge differences in the world. There is a saying that if you have made the world a better place than it was without you than you have had a successful life. I'd say Bill Gates and Steve Jobs were very successful. But would they have been so successful without their partners Paul Allen and Steve Wozniak? In the beginning Allen and Wozniak were as invested in their companies as Gates and Jobs, but once a large degree of success was maintained they moved on to other things. Allen, in particular, led a fascinating life after Microsoft - check him out on Wikipedia 

People get emotionally invested in many entertainers and their sports heroes. Think Frank Sinatra, the Beatles, and many other successful entertainers. Think Tom Brady, Joe Montana and Bobby Orr among others. Authors? Few have as rabid a following as Stephen King. Each of the named individuals was emotionally invested in their particular field and attracted fans of their works that were emotionally invested in their careers.

Look at the political career of someone like Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump. They both attract rabid followers of their particular ideologies. Regardless of your opinion of the ideologies of these individuals, their devotees are among the most passionate around.

As we travel on our paths down our roads of life we will undoubtedly make emotional investments in many people and things. Some will enjoy success, others not so much. The key is to keep moving and making those investments. You never know when one of those investments will pay dividends - some may not show their real value for decades and suddenly pop up and enrich you when it is least expected but most needed. We should all be so lucky.

Please visit the other members of the 5-on-1 team to see what they have to say about this week's topic, chosen by Padmini. Ramana, Padmum, Sanjana & Conrad  

See you next week, same shack time and same shack channel.


3 comments:

  1. If ever there were someone I could count on to have my back, it would be you. I also know you've paid the price for being all in when tragedy struck, but I also know that your capacity to get back up and invest again are part of the best of your humanity.

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  2. Perhaps their are degrees of emotional investment — that all or nothing is judiciously given.

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  3. You never fail to amaze me with your ability to come up with just the right music for the topic concerned. That aside, your approach has been vastly different from mine and the Old Fossils but, carried a punch . I have no hesitation whatsoever in agreeing with and endorsing TOF 's comments here.

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