Panic

Panic - that overwhelming feeling of anxiety caused by some deed done or undone that causes near immediate  and often total cessation of rational thought and may even kick-starts one's fight or flight mechanism.  Happens to me almost every Friday at 5AM when I sit down in front of the computer and realize that despite promising myself to do the LBC blog Thursday when there's plenty of time circumstances have once again prevented me from keeping that simple promise to myself. Yikes.  Here we go again.

Panic is clearly rooted deep within our brains. Kept early man - well - some of them - from being a meal to some long lost critter.  Fight or flight.  Can I whup that critter's ass?  Can it whup mine? Decision time.

Panic can be used to one's advantage - make the other guy panic and increase your advantage of prevailing in whatever the mutual endeavor. Assuming of course you have the ability to follow through and take advantage of the situation.

Panic is common in sports - especially in close contests. I have first-hand experience with that from my bygone jock days.  Bottom of the last inning, you've offered up your best fastball and the resulting crack of the bat sends shivers down your spine as you turn to watch the ball take a long, long journey to distant lands.  (well - these days it might be the loud ping of aluminum - not the same thing really). Actually I've been on both sides of that one - the pitcher and the batter.  Then there's the panic you feel when your errant fastball lands squarely between the eyes of a batter, he drops like a sack of bricks and is motionless.  Been there, done that too. (He's fine) 

Panic is something that needs to be managed as best you can. Control it and your life can be better.  Give in to it and expect to pay the consequences. 

Here's a short list of things that cause me to panic - care to share yours???

1) Friday mornings, 5AM
2) Email from my bank about the level of funds (or lack thereof) in my account _notice how they never email you and say gee - you have x figures in your account - good job
3) Screeching car brakes in front of the house and neither DJ (grandson) nor Ginger (dog) are immediately visible
4) NHL lockout - thereby removing one of my releases from the insanity that is my daily life
5) the first note of damn near any disco song

Truth be told I'm actually a pretty stable although somewhat excitable fellow.  Real panic is not something I've had to deal with much.  I try to be prepared for most anything by taking care of business.

I will, though, admit to some frustration that this vision quest that is my life is causing me.  I'm circling the drain as my good pal Audrey says - is it time to panic?

That's my somewhat light-hearted take on Panic.  Check out what the other LBC posters have to say on the matter.  Anu, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Maxi, Maria SF, ocdwriter, Padmum, Paul, Ramana The Old Fossil and Will.  

Friday LBC Topic - Pain

Welcome to the Friday LBC topic where you can get a layered look at the weekly topic as discussed by a group that posts somewhat simultaneously.  This week the topic is Pain - brought to us by the Old Fossil, otherwise known as Conrad.

Pain can be both easy and quite difficult to describe and/or discuss.

Physical pain is to me the easiest.  In it's purest form, physical pain is a reaffirmation of life.  If you hurt you must be breathing, although I'm sure that if the pain is  intense - say a broken tooth with an exposed nerve, a throbbing hand caused by being a stuck-on-dumb catcher that sticks his fist in front of the catcher's mitt before the arrival of a fastball, or even riding your bike into a car when you were not paying attention to things right in front of you might make you question the happy to be alive notion.

Then there's the pain of loss, betrayal and the like.  That's where the description gets sticky as the pain is so personal. Losing a beloved parent - as did Fos and Lady Fos.  The kind of pain that leaves you feeling hollow and empty until you begin to celebrate the life of that loved one - at which time the pendulum may swing back to the joy side of the equation.  Or the pain of losing a loved one that does not physically depart but simply exists as a shell of their former self.

How do you describe the pain caused by confusion over the loss of a parent that may not have been so beloved but was in many ways respected as well as resented?  We are watching that unfold daily through the eyes and words of our friend Ramana.

Then there's the numbing pain of depression - the pain that leaves you feeling helpless, hopeless and lonely, no matter how many people share your residence.  It's perhaps the most dangerous pain of all because if you don't take control of it the results can mean loss for your loved ones.

Pain is clearly part of our shared human existence and it is how we respond to it that in many ways shapes us as people and  a society.  Some  people try and internalize pain and keep it to themselves.

Others immediately send out a cry for help.

Whichever side describes you, just remember that you are not alone.  Those of you with faith have that.  Those of us that do not have faith have friends and family.  Don't let pain get the better of you. Hang in there. Pain is not forever.


 

Please see what other members of our group have to say on the matter -
 Anu, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Maxi, Maria SF, ocdwriter, Padmum, Paul, Ramana The Old Fossil and Will.  

What “lesson from mom” do you still live by today?

My apologies for being a day late on this weeks LBC topic - What “lesson from mom” do you still live by today?- but other than a brief 90 minute lunch visit with an old friend it has been a lousy week. The details are irrelevant.

This isn't an easy topic for me because I was raised by my grandmother until I was 10 and we moved to California, and by then there was a new stepfather and sister. My mom worked - she was divorced and my grandmother widowed when I was 3. Incidentally I've never referred to Jack McConvey as my stepfather unless pushed on the issue as he is simply my dad.

Now as regards my mother - well - there's not really much she imparted to me that I can recall beyond the 20 or so years of lies she told me about my birth father, and that's another story altogether. I suppose she tried to make that up by caring for my son for a couple of years so perhaps he is better qualified to answer the question.  I like to cook but that's a defense mechaniasm as both my mom and wife were never great in the kitchen.

She did always work hard and was well thought of wherever she worked so I'll take that as her best advice or lesson as it's something I've always tried to do.  I like to give a bit more than an honest days work every day. I have never felt guilty about my paycheck.

I hope you've checked the other LBC members for their takes on this week's topic.

What does heaven look like?

This weeks topic comes from Delirious - our unabashed LDS blogger now in China.  Thanks "D".

This is a difficult topic for me as I simply do not believe in the theology of Christian religion - and in fact most if not all organized religions.  My complaint is simply that religions become dominated by people and so they are organized around the prejudices of those people.  Case in point - Protestants split off from Catholics with whom there were some disagreements. Yes that's the Cliff's Notes version but I think you get my drift. If Christianity is real and true then there's one flavor - not many.  One set of rules - not many. And when I hear born-again Christians claiming the 10 Commandments I have to wonder what Mel Brooks and the tribe think - Moses was a Jew.  So was Jesus.

Now if western religion is real I suppose it's one of 3 flavors - Judaism - the real base - Catholic - the first so-called Christians - or Mormon. Simple logic really - the originals are correct, God corrected an error of sorts and established Christianity or he issued a further course correction and gave old Joe Smith some golden tablets and decided he'd better stay in closer contact with his chosen folks to keep them on the right path.

That would make heaven look like the western view to a degree but since I do not believe that I'll just go with this - heaven is what you see all around you every day.  It's what you make it.  If you so choose you make it your own personal hell. You make choices every day that shape your existence. If you choose to believe some old gentleman in flowing robes with long hair and a beard is guiding you that is your choice.  You may call it faith.  Your choice. Just not mine.   I  certainly do not object to anyone having faith - I simply object to them dictating my life by their faith's rules - I happen to think the universal guidelines offered by our founding fathers were sufficient and though they enjoy a basis in Jewish thought they do not dictate we lead a Jewish life.  Nor a Christian one.  Just a decent one. And to my way of thinking, a decent life is a life in heaven. Speed bumps and all. Truth be told, none of us will really know what is true until we've circled the drain and the tub is empty. 

That's a Cliff's Notes version of what I think heaven looks like. Take a look at what the other LBC members have to say -  Anu, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Maxi, Maria SF, ocdwriter, Padmum, Paul, Ramana The Old Fossil and Will.  

If it's Friday it must be LBC day

Fridays are the day the LBC tests the theory that if you lock a bunch of people in a room and give them a single topic upon which to expound they'll offer as many flavors of commentary as there are people in the room.  This weeks topic is "The oddest place you've slept in/on"

I've pondered this question quite some time now and come to the conclusion that when it comes to sleeping I am flat out boring.  Damn - that kinda sucks!

Best tale I can recall is back in 1976 whilst driving cross country to set up the family tent for Lynn, dog Sherman, cat Mr Peabody and myself in Connecticut I spent a night - along with said animals - Lynn was still in California   at home - at a fleabag no-tell motel in rural Pennsylvania. The back of the room backed up to woods populated with numerous thin trunked trees of a type I never ascertained. There were no curtains over the windows.  All I can say for sure is the animals were freaked out all night and I barely slept at all.  Every horror flick ever made used these woods as a model for the "don't go in there - you're about to die" scene. If it was an episode of Star Trek I surely would have been wearing the red uniform.

When the wind blew, there were branches scraping windows and the roof. I swear on several occasions there were sets of eyes glowing as they stared at Peabody, Sherman and me - I only hoped the tiny splashing sounds were not drool as said critters tried to decide if we were a late dinner or would be breakfast.  I suspect after seeing my circumferentially challenged self they were out looking for a large freezer so they could plan several meals.

Naturally the guy that ran the place looked like the banjo playing kid in Deliverance's older sibling and the only sound out of the radio was Hillbilly Howdown - this of course being long before I moved to Texas and aquired a faux appreciation of country music.  You know the stuff I mean - play it backwards and you get your job back, your girl back and if you're really lucky you get your dog back.  TV was nothing but snow.  Cable was in its infancy and I suspect only available in areas with substantially larger populations.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity there was sun.  Light.  Yay. 

 I packed up the animals, tossed them into the Plymouth Fury and beat feet the hell outta there. We spent the next few nights with my buddy Stuart in his apartment in New Jersey - Stuart being an engineer with Bell Labs in Holmdel who would go on to be a major player in a somewhat minor invention called the cellular phone.  Needless to say he had a lot of fun at my expense.

That's my tale of how to not get a good night's sleep. Check out what the other LBC members had to say on this week's topic.  Anu, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Maxi, Maria SF, ocdwriter, Padmum, Paul, RAmana The Old Fossil and Will.

Another one falls...

Trutrh be told, I really hate this getting older stuff.  I realize it is inevitable - don't confuse fat with stupid.  It's just that it gets depressing watching my cultural icons pass on.  We lost another one over the weekend - Scott McKenzie. 

Scott had a monster hit in the sixties 

This song has always been one of my favorites and to this day I get homesick when I hear it.  Even though I've been in Texas lmost 20 years it will NEVER be home. Home will always be the SF Bay Area.It's where most of my family lives and where I found lifelong friendships with a few people that have been very important to me.  Scott McKenzie had a fantastic voice and he was so much more than that one song - but if you are going to be known for one song, San Francisco is not a bad one at all.  Remember this  one?

Earlier this year we also lost Jon Lord of Deep Purple.

Best version ever of this classic song.

Please excuse me for being maudlin - it's just that music mean a lot to me and each of these losses hurts - luckily the music still lives.

LBC topic of the week - Fire

This week's topic is really quite interesting.

You just know crazy old Arthur would appear here. Of course he is singing about the burning fire that is the great cleanser.  Even better than Ajax.  How many times have you read that forest fires, prairie fires and such are Mother Nature's way of clearing out the trash.  Personally I prefer garbage cans but it's not my call.   It's a necessity but you'll pardon me for not seeing the necessity of scaring the hell outta my friends in Avery twice when fire almost got their home. 

Then there's the fire of the heart.  We all know that one.  Hopefully.  Everyone needs passion, be it for someone or something. 

    

Fire is/was a turning point for civilization.  Before fire it was a sushi world.  Fire brought heat on demand.  No thermostat - those came a few years later - but we could warm our homes - and a warm cave was a good thing.  Fire became an obsession of sorts. Still is to some - we call them arsonists.  Clearly fire's place in civilization deserves more space than allotted here. Maybe another time.

Now we have the verb fire - as in to fire.  That's an important part of our culture as every couple of years we get to fire politicians - assuming we muster the energy to go to the polling place. We blame them (pols) for nearly everything so we certainly should fire them if they do not serve our best interests. Or shut up about it.  And who among us has not been fired from a job in their lifetime. That hurts almost as much as a burn from flame in many instances.

So - fire is ever present.  It has many uses, values and forms.  It can be a good thing or not.  The optimist sees a city devastated by fire as a golden opportunity to rebuild an even better place.  Chicago comes to mind.  I'm not sure Londoners (the English ones at least) or citizens of Dresden see it that way but rebuild they did.  Out of necessity. We broke it - we fixed it (man in general).  Fire helped us get where we are today - our civilization probably would not exist in its present form without fire.  The threat of raining fire on our enemies has balanced the power internationally for decades.  Balanced the fear may be a better term -  but it's the threat of fire that matters. The deep, cleansing, purging fire that would basically end us all. Now there's a thought.

Personally, I don't expect that to happen any time soon.  At least I hope not. I'll just hope for the best. Musically, Fire is great.  Always has been. And music keeps me sane.  Allegedly sane anyway.

    
Check out what the other LBC folks had to say - , Anu, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Maxi, Maria SF, ocdwriter, Padmum, Paul, RAmana The Old Fossil and Will.